Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Cruise Control

Have you guys ever seen the classic gay flick, "Parting Glances'? It's about a group of young guys who partying together and are trying to survive the gay dating game. There are cool scenes of hot guys cruising across the room, looking for love.
The art of the cruise is something mastered. Guys think they need to stare and burn a hole through a guy. That's not cruising, that's being crude.

So you're standing across from the bar in the far corner of the room. In comes a hot looking guy walking up to the bar to order a drink. He gets his drink and then proceeds to the wall across from you. You are hugging your beer bottle and take some discrete glances as you chug down. The other guy is just getting adjusted to his "stand and pose" position. That may take a few seconds as he also glances around the room.

The first cruise is to assess who's there. This is usually a wide sweeping 180 degree turn of the eyes. You may meet someone else's eyes during that first glance, but usually not. You are there to observe. If a guy is looking around the room too quickly, he might not be cruising, but is looking for someone who he is supposed to met there. NEVER assume that he may be interested in you, when instead is trying to find a friend in the crowd of hot men now beginning to pour into the bar.

The art of the successful cruise is to patient. If you do meet another guy's glance, smile back. That never hurts. Don't continue fixing your stare once that connection is made. You can return there in a few minutes. Guys make the serious mistake of interperting that fixation with interest. Then they make their way over and it always turns out that these guys are overanxious and become too touchy, feely.

The art of the come on is a subject for a future blog. However if after several meeting of the eyes, someone has got to make a move. If you do, remember to make it friendly and not intrusive. The guy may not be out yet or he is on the prowl because his boy friend is out of town. What you say next is all important. More on how to make the next move will be discussed in a future blog. Stay tuned.

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