Friday, February 23, 2007

Sorry to Keep Revisting This Story, But It's Definitely Worth Repeating

Why Can't Guys Learn that "Tina" is a BITCH, and get her out of their lives?

The following is from a news item posted on the Washington Blade web site.

The Atlanta Meth Task Force convened the forum at Outwrite after several recent deaths of local crystal meth users. The emotional forum included testimony from Josh Williams’ brother, one of guys who recently died of an overdose in the Atlanta area, as well as from Tommy Varnador, who wept as he talked about the November overdose death of his partner, Joseph Myska.

“This drug fills a void in people — a sense of guilt, a sense of shame,” said Brian Dew, a professor at Georgia State University who leads the Atlanta Meth Task Force. “It’s seen as a perfect short-term solution to the feelings that are there.”Drawing attention to the harmful effects of meth is particularly challenging among gay men, Dew said.“I think that the gay community has been reluctant to address our own pitfalls, and I think we’re seeing it with drug use,” Dew said. “But we can no longer sit back because of what it’s doing and the impact that it’s having.”

Russell Beasley talked about how he and Josh Williams had a “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” attitude in many parts of their friendship, including drug use. But instead of being inspired by a desire not to appear judgmental, the informal policy was a manifestation of both men’s fears that if his friend knew the truth about him, he would no longer love him and would leave.

Gay men can no longer afford to mask their insecurities through drugs or indifference, Beasley said.“In the old days, when we were fighting HIV, we were going out and we were doing AIDS education and we were fighting to save lives — it’s kind of the same thing,” Beasley. “We all need to go out, spread the word, let everybody know that meth equals death, and that there is healing that can be achieved from everything.”

Also participating in the Outwrite forum was Mark White, who talked about how he had a staunchly conservative disdain for drug use most of his life before going through a difficult break-up.Crystal meth use, however, led to White landing in jail on Thanksgiving Day as well as Tina-fueled sex romps that led him to becoming HIV positive.“I became very lonely, I began to shy away from some of the things that I never really dealt with — for example, being comfortable being gay,” White said. “I’m a shy person by nature, but on crystal I became very sociable, I felt very powerful, very confident and very sexual.”

Guys have to have will power. Can't they realize that a guy can be sexual without the so called enhancement of fatal drugs? Is it too much to ask that guys interact more with their brains than with the lure of drugs? Can't guys get a woody by just taking in the "woofyness" of another guy's pleasure?

Drugs just fuck up the pleasures of the sexual experience. If guys invested some time for foreplay, they'd realize that great sex and staying power can come naturally. Drawing this from within, can make sex between two men real, and rememberable.

I know you guys have strong opinions on the subject. I can't accept the fact that guys can be so lonely that their only recourse is to use crystal. We've already seen these cries played out daily by Britney and look what happened to Anna Nicole. So why are guys who can have it all, killing themselves for instant, at the moment, pleasure? Self esteem seems to be at an all time low.


Ed said...

I agree drugs are so wrong. Yet, I have avoided them all my life and live a lonely existence. I live in a small town and when I visit the larger cities all I find are Gays on drugs. They stare at me like I'm crazy when I say I don't do drugs. They can't seem to have sex unless they are high on something. Sorry, I just can't get in to the drug scene. I'd rather be alone.

Rob said...

I haven't had sex on drugs in years, and I've never met "Tina", but gay guys having sex with drugs is nothing new. In the 70's and 80's it was poppers. In the early 90's it was E or coke. Among the granola crunchies it's always been pot or hash (my personal favorite.) And lord only knows how many guys get it on after a couple beers.

I agree that for the most part, sex is better clean. But just as sometimes you really need to be chained into a sling (or tying someone up to a cross or something), sometimes a hit of your chemical of choice can be just what it takes to push an encounter over the line from good to "remember it till my dying day". (Not always in a good way.... I had a totally hot scene 12 years ago where a top had me screwing his lover while he kept feeding me poppers.... after a while I couldn't keep it up anymore and then the bed collapsed on my feet. Ow.)

It is a shame that the urban party people are so dependent upon that little extra push, but then, I don't really do urban party people, and for more reasons than their drug habits.

Anonymous said...




Leonard said...

Yet another bad stereotype that we gay men have to live with. I don't do drugs...and when I have sex, why would I want something that takes part of that from me?? ;-) peace

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Chris said...

Hey Buff,

Great post again. I have never tried "tina" or any of the other drugs out there. And I hope to stay that way. My self-esteem is good sometimes and other times it is not. I have recently have been trying to not drink for a while.
Trying to take better care of myself. I guess I am trying to not need to drink to cope when times get bad. And that is hard sometimes but I feel its necessary right now. Your posts are always very inspiring.



JB said...

I never touch drugs.

What movie is that pic from? It looks awful familiar...

Ed said...

I really like the hairy biker look in a guy. I don't have a bike of my own but I used to ride on the back of my cousins bike. I don't think he liked my arms around him but I didn't want to fall off ;)

Albert said...

The big crystal stuff began once I gave up doing hard drugs. During my days it was coke and I had my fare share of that!!! I used it to dull some of the pain because of the stuff I was doing so I can understand why some of these guys do it. I wish they didn't, but some people do not know that they have other options or it is too late. Addiction can happen very quickly especially when the person is getting something positive out of the situation.