Friday, January 18, 2008

Stay Clean by Playing Clean


The following article is from the New York Observer. What do you think?


At 3 a.m. on a recent Sunday morning, the East Village gay bars were real dead. There had been rumors of a sporadic back room—that's the lingo for "blacked-out broom closet where dudes get it on"—at Nowhere, a casual basement bar on 14th Street between First and Second avenues.


That night, the alleged back room was a well-lit coat check. The Phoenix, down the road on 13th Street, was surprisingly empty at a little after 3 a.m.; only a handful of patrons, most with friends, were about. Phoenix is the East Village bar of choice for the young bearded set, the semi-free young things. Behind the velvet curtain obscuring the view into the Urge, down on Second Avenue and Second Street, some real tawdry jockstrap-clad strippers gyrated on the bar; friends drank. The oddly suburban lounge was moderately fuller.


The Urge's even-darker and worse-smelling neighbor, the Cock, was a bit more boisterous; a knot of dozens of boys were too thick to get through, but they were leaving in singles and groups and sometimes even pairs pretty fast by 3:45 a.m. A few blocks north, on Fourth Street, the Bijou, also known as Club 82, which is a longtime porno theater/sex club with grubby black cubicles, had its roll-down gate locked—something you would never have seen in the 90's.


("Where East Village boys go when they want to cheat on their husbands," says the 1994 edition of "Betty and Pansy's Severe Queer Review of New York." Not anymore!) It's hard to find the public scene for this epidemic—the kind we were trained to recognize years ago as looking something like a scene from Cruising with Al Pacino. And yet 651 gay men aged 13 to 29 tested positive in 2005; 693 did so in 2006.


At least 30 percent of all people testing positive had been infected in the previous six months.


Where is this happening?The report from the city, which shows that the number of new H.I.V. diagnoses among gay men under 30 has been greater each year since at least 2001, spurred a New York Times editorial this week. The paper noted past public health successes:


"From San Francisco to New York, bathhouses notorious for promoting casual sex changed the way they did business or closed down." Some allowed monitoring, few closed—more opened!—and they put a bucket of condoms in the entryway. But having been to bathhouses in Phoenix, San Francisco, Fort Lauderdale and New York City the author has never seen any zealous adherence to safe-sex guidelines, or any intrusion in the ability there to have non-safe sex beyond some helpful (and correct) advice from the occasional social-worker types. That The Times believes in that success fairy tale should make it unsurprising that the city's health department probably does, too.


The connection between a rise in H.I.V. in young men and bathhouses and sex parties is still unproven. But closing them or clamping down on them is always the first response to flare-ups in the epidemic.The gay- and AIDS-service organizations want to make sure that these rising infection rates do not result in the shuttering of bathhouses, because where else can they reach the at-risk populations they are pledged to serve? And other times it only drains resources on a public relations spectacle.


At a meeting held at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center on West 13th Street last week, Joshua Volle, the former director of H.I.V. Prevention Planning at the city's health department, described the city's position on AIDS prevention among these increasingly at-risk young men. "They are very much looking at this from a medical model, and the medical model says shut them down," he said, according to a report in the gay weekly Gay City News. "They don't have the resources to do it, but their intent is to shut them down. ...


These are my words, they are on a witch hunt." And now that a new horror-show strain of "flesh-eating bacteria" has been catalogued over the past few years in gay men in San Francisco and Boston (the results were published in the upcoming issue of the Annals of Internal Medicine), the city will presumably enact any public health measures it might wish. (After all, it's a drug-resistant ass plague. What's … next? Ass locusts?)


The city will be scrutinizing the smuthouses closely in the coming months. There will be the bathhouses, small places like the West Side Club in Chelsea, and sex parties, of which there are dozens, and include the NY Jockparty ("You can bring your own alcohol and poppers if you like. DRUGS ARE NEVER ALLOWED!"). Fifty-eight people attended a recent event of theirs on New Year's Day, according to an e-mail from its proprietor.


That's about how many people were in the Cock on Saturday. Meanwhile, Manhunt.net, the leading gay hookup site, limits search results listings to 1,500 active members—and a search for men online in New York City generally returns the full 1,500. (On Monday afternoon, it dropped to 1,440 active members; on Tuesday morning, it fell to a bit more than 1,100.)


Give or take, a third or so of the members list themselves as 30 years old or younger; a similar number identify as H.I.V. positive.Like a small-town newspaper puzzled at its declining readership, the city doesn't know how to get on the Internet to conduct its business. The logic guiding the City is that if venues that receive complaints that violate the sanitary code are shut down, then there will be no opportunity for sex acts to occur.


"It's not bad logic," said Mr. Volle, who has become an ordained interfaith minister and is doing some consulting work designing and evaluating HIV programs, "but it doesn't take into consideration the private sex parties that are growing in leaps and bounds, and going further and further underground. What's happening is it's making it more and more difficult for the community-based organizations to get in to the New York City-based sex parties and create a harm reduction atmosphere."


On Craigslist, one outreach worker from Harlem United has been sensibly and gently intruding, posting every few days that he is there to answer "ANY questions." He writes: "I'm a pretty laid-back dude, no judgments, just info and str8 up answers." On Saturday at 6 p.m., a Craigslist posting in the Manhattan M4M section went up, with the headline "HSV2+ HPV+ HIV- Young Attractive Guy Looking - 20.""Anyone else out there with these rediculous std's? I have HSV2 (genital herpes) and HPV viruses from the few sexual encounters I've experienced and would not wish them on others," wrote the poster. "Anyone honest enough and in a similar boat?


Young and attractive perhaps? I might be reaching for the stars but hey its NYC why not try." Did this breaking of social customs work?"Nobody is honest about it," the poster wrote in an e-mail, describing the responses he received. "I have no luck meeting anyone."


He'll do better if he lies. NOT!!!


I commend guys who keep themselves clean and play safer using condoms. But this viscious spread of STD's makes playing very, very risky.


So guys, try not to go blindly into a sexual tryst. It's not only the crabs we're talking about, it's much,much more.


Buddy body bonding should be fun, not a horror story. Treat your body as a temple so that other hot guys can worship it safely. WOOF

Friday, January 11, 2008

Making This New Year The Best Ever





Howdy guys and a super Happy New Year to Each and Every One of you.

Hoping your New Year so far has been fantastic and fulfilling. WOOOF.


To start off the New Year, it's time for a Top 10 list.


David Goulart of the Edge New England shares his thoughts on the Top Ten Gay Myths.


Enjoy!!!


From Edge New England TOP 10 GAY MYTHSby David Goulart
Sunday Jan 6, 2008


1. The myth of gay recruitment. I can and did find a spouse from the existing pool of gay people the Creator created. I am not out to convert you or your kids. Don't want to. Don't need to. God gave me plenty of people to choose from. I chose one already.


Yes, God gave us gaydar. We need to practice using it more. Use it or lose it, as the saying goes.


2. Being gay is about more than sex. My gayness is based in love, notsex. I have an emotional, intimate connection with my spouse. Sure, we have sex, but it doesn't define us as a couple, or as people. I admire him for his kindness, his honesty, his commitment to his family, his intelligence, and dedication to OUR family to name just a few.


But when it cums to sex, what glorious, safer sex levels of enjoyment and intimacy it can be.


3. Pedophiles come in all forms. There are "bad gay people" just as there are "bad straight people." We've got some pedophiles among our group; so do you - you actually have MORE. Can we agree to focus on fighting pedophilia? Gay, straight. Doesn't matter. Pedophiles are bad for kids.


Amen. Pedophiles need help to control their disease.


4. The gay community is diverse. We are not all men in leather thongs with feather boas dancing on top of Gay Pride Parade floats. We're not all male, all white, all rich or all anything else.


We are the rainbow, we are the world. So straights, get used to it. By the way, WOOOF, keep the leather thong and studed jockstrap, drop the feather boas.


5. Some of us believe in God. If James Lipton of the Actor's Studio ever has occasion to interview me, I have a ready-made answer to one of his standard questions. When I arrive at Heaven's Pearly Gates, the first thing I hope to hear God say is: "Yes, David, you have a reservation -but I'm afraid I don't see Pat Robertson or Jerry Falwell on the list."The God I believe in is loving, libratory and downright radical. (and I know wishing hell on anyone isn't exactly a demonstration of loving).


Couldn't agree more.


6. I already can get married in a church. Some Christian denominations allow for this. Others don't. I'm not asking your church to bless me and my spouse. When it comes to "gay marriage," all we're after is the civil stuff. You know, things like having the rights of a spouse when my partner's dying in the hospital. Being able provide for my partner should I pass away and not worry about a distant relative taking thehouse and more. Those sorts of things.


One day, we all shall the right to marry the loves of our lives in any type of ceremony, civil, religious, or otherwise.


7. Slurs go both ways (pun intended.) The gay community has names foryou, too. I won't call you a "breeder," if you don't call me a "sodomite" or "faggot."


Using Queer to self define us is an acceptable all encompassing term. Daddies, bears, fuzzies, woof, and other expressions are terms of endearment.


8. Rainbows belong to us. Please quit putting rainbow stickers on yourcars. Please quit hanging rainbow flower leis on your rear view mirrors.Contrary to popular belief, not all of us are equipped with 100-percent accurate gaydar, and if you have rainbows all over your person or property, we may well assume you are a "member of the family."


Like lojack, there should be a better way to spot gay hunks on the open highway, aside from the blue and gold equal sign bumper stickers.


9. We have the same problems you do. We worry about making a living, putting food on the table, paying the bills, staying healthy, getting ahead just like you do. Just because many of us walk around with a huge smile and seem to be optimistic doesn't mean we are not worried on the inside. It does not mean life is a basket of daisies, we just choose to keep our problems private.


So true, so true. And that's why I hope our votes will count this year. After all, "it's the economy, stupid!!!!", as we seek changes in our country from our Presidential aspirants.


10. We notice your inconsistencies. If you really, really don't like gay people and think gay sex is disgusting, quit buying porn with women having sex with women. (That's gay sex. In some cases, it's bisexual sex, if a real - not plastic - penis is involved.) Americans spend a billion dollars a year on porn; it's been a long time since someone produced a "straight" porn film that didn't have two women going at it.If you quit buying this stuff, maybe the porn industry would fold -something that, I think, might benefit women across all orientations.


Safer Gay sex is fuckin awesome. Definitely worth repeating.


I'd like to add some of my own observations as well as add some others to the list.


11. Only bottom boys have bubble butts. NOT!!! I can show you plenty of top guys with hot buns. Too bad they are only for looking and not fucking. I guess all of that ramming action keeps top guy's butts from sagging.


12. Safer sex is boring. NOT!!!! Fucking with a condom and incorporating foreplay in the sexplay is the hottest form of m2m sex around. Something that I hope more guys resolve to enjoy in the New Year.


Well, there you have it. Feel free to express your own observations.


Mega hairy muscle hugs everyday to make this world a better place to live.