Love Your Body, And All of Your Body Parts, But Make Sure It is the Best Body It Can Be.

The following is from the current issue of the Advocate.

See what you think.

The Naked Truth

Twenty-two people of all shapes and sizes strip down, pose, and spill their guts about what they love and hate about their bodies.

Click the byline to view more stories by this author.Photography by Eric Schwabel
A shorter version of this story appeared in The Advocate September 23, 2008

They say you can see a person’s soul if you stare into his eyes—but perhaps the quickest way to really know someone is to have him take off his clothes. That’s why we asked 22 people to undress and bare their insecurities. Some of their hang-ups are unexpected (Really? Too big!?), others are heart-wrenching. All of them will have you looking at yourself differently the next time you’re naked. Click on the links below for profiles, photos, and video for each of the participants.

Jim Andre, 60San Luis Obispo, Calif.Likes: arms, chest Dislikes: waistline
Gustavo Marzolla, 32Belo Horizonte, Brazil Likes: face, chest Dislikes: legs
Willam Belli, 24Philadelphia Likes: nose, torso Dislikes: scarred left leg
Dasha Snyder, 38Baltimore Likes: brain and feet—“because they get me where I’m going”Dislikes: scarred abdomen
Patrick Henry, 40Taos, N.M.Likes: chest hair and muscle Dislikes: weight—too skinny
Chad Darnell, 35Atlanta Likes: hands Dislikes: stomach
Trevor Wayne, 30All over the Midwest Likes: everything that’s tattooed Dislikes: forehead
Mark Hersh, 39Newport Beach, Calif.Likes: chest, eyes Dislikes: abs, buttocks
Sean Ching, (age undisclosed)Hawaii Likes: his muscles Dislikes: he sometimes feels fat
Jim Morris, 73New York City Likes: body Dislikes: face
Rodrigo Toledo, 32Rio de Janeiro Likes: hands, chest Dislikes: that he breaks out
Jeff Lukomski, 44Detroit Likes: smile, eyes Dislikes: penis -- too big
Calpernia Addams, 37Nashville Likes: eyes Dislikes: “I’m too tall and too big”
Shawnee Harkins, 26Dallas Likes: arms, shoulders, triceps, rear Dislikes: abs

Corey Saucier, 31Los Angeles Likes: masculine frame Dislikes: stomach
J.T. Chestnut, 19Rock Ridge–Wilson, N.C.Likes: legs Dislikes: belly button, nose
Jim Howley, 33Hilliard, Ohio Likes: heart, eyes Dislikes: “I love all of myself”
Alex LiMandri, 30Metz, France Likes: chest Dislikes: legs
Carlos Fierros, 23Oakley, Calif.Likes: face, legs Dislikes: stomach
Profiles by Neal Broverman, Kyle Buchanan, Japhy Grant

Be happy with your body, but strive to make it the best body it can be.

There is no such thing as the Adonis look. Male Beauty is definitely in the eye of the beholder.

Some parts we can never really appreciate about ourselves, because we never see them in the right light. So graciously accept any and all comments about your strong back, shoulders, and butt cheeks.

As I have stated earlier, I can find at least something positive, great, erotic, about every male body. So check out your assets, work on what's great about your body, accentuate the positive, and go for it.

I challenge you to a 60 day hunky bod workout. Let me know how it goes.

Giving you mega hairy muscle hugs of encouragement. You got the bod, now make it happen.

Fat Chance That You'll Ever Want To Meet Up With Mr. Phoney Baloney

The following sounds extreme, but it has happened and will happen in our cyberworld.

Sometimes a make-believe relationship is better than the real thing.
By Q. Allan Brocka

From The Advocate March 11, 2008

I knew my new boyfriend was fake right from the start. It was obvious: He had unbelievably sexy pictures, a modeling career, obscenely rich parents, an Ivy League education, and a brand-new record deal at a Big Label -- all at the age of 26. OK, maybe I could buy all that. But add the fact that he wanted to be with me and it was too good to be true.

Our romance began with an online message. He said something snarky. I said I liked his moxie. My jaw dropped at his too-hot-to-be-real JPEGs. Our one-liners continued as he sent a wide-enough range of pictures to convince me he was an actual person. Not that it mattered, with him in New York and me in Los Angeles.

HIM: This sucks, let’s talk on the phone.
ME: If you mean phone sex, not my thing.
HIM: Don’t be retarded.

He had me at retarded. He was charming, funny, and had a sexy voice and impressive vocabulary. I lay in bed and we talked for the next three hours. His name was Josh Alexander.* (*not his real name) (**not that he used his real name) (But it could have been Buzz or Bolt)

Josh spent seven years traveling the world as a fashion model. He’d invested his earnings well, and with his inheritance he was set for life. He had a knack for songwriting and sometimes performed at friends’ parties. (THE BULLSHIT IS PILING UP AT THIS POINT) (BUT WAIT,THERE'S MORE)

That’s where he was discovered by a music exec from Big Label, which was throwing tons of money behind him and his debut album. In fact, Big Label’s chairman was personally grooming him to be a rock star.

He enjoyed the fuss but ultimately didn’t give a shit about fame or the music business. His real dream was to open a Cuban-style catering company in Northern California. He wanted kids, a house, a giant kitchen, and me.

When we finally hung up, I was buzzing with that incredible high you can only get from a really good conversation. I smiled and thought, He’s totally fake.

The next day we chatted for two more hours. It became a nightly ritual. Over the next two months we shared every detail of our lives, the exciting to the mundane.

His stories ranged from his first runway job when he had no idea what the hell he was doing (as Giorgio Armani himself stitched him into a suit) to the time LL Cool J propositioned him in Paris. I knew how his parents met, about his father’s affair, his immigrant grandfather who built their fortune from nothing. I knew about his childhood, his brothers, and each of his ex-boyfriends. I knew more about Josh than most of my friends.

I decided, as long I didn’t spend money and wasn’t turning down actual dates, I had nothing to lose. When I’d tell him he was fake, he’d laugh and list attributes that made me seem too good to be true. I told you he was charming. Sometimes I’d ask random questions to test him. He always gave an impromptu but riveting answer. Then he’d bust me: “There, now do you think I’m real?”

One night he announced, “Guess who you’re having dinner with in three weeks?” Josh was finally coming to L.A.!

A week later he stopped calling and his online profile disappeared.

I called and e-mailed repeatedly. No response. I thought our finale would be more dramatic. Maybe I’d find proof he was fake or we’d have a disastrous first date.

But he simply vanished. When a friend randomly mentions he’s buddies with the founder of Big Label, I tell him my story and he offers to look into it. Turns out there is indeed a Josh Alexander, some guy in Florida who once submitted a demo to them. That’s it.

My friend suggests that Josh Alexander isn’t my fake boyfriend in New York. My fake boyfriend is likely someone who’s obsessed with Josh Alexander, because psychotic con artists tend to appropriate other people’s identities. And now that he knows all about my life, there’s a distinct possibility he’s pretending to be me with someone else.

It’s crazy, but despite the big fat lie part, my connection with my fake boyfriend still feels more substantial than most of my real relationships. Maybe it’s because I gave him chances that are hard to give when you’re looking someone in the eye. Maybe I finally heard the things I wanted someone to say. Or maybe I’m just into psychopaths, because, sad as it is, if my fake boyfriend called, I’d probably take him back.

NOT!!! Guys you are too smart to fall for such a set up. When a guy seems too good to be true, then maybe it's a sign to stand back. Hell, all of us have met this type of guy. Some of them are so transparent. Others are merely pathetic.

So just don't fall for the sweet talk and the pretty face. Like the commercial used to say, "Always Rely on Genuine GM Parts from Mr. GoodWrench". A guy that is handy with his toolbox is a guy to keep around. WOOF. Mega hairy muscle hugs and Happy March.