Thursday, February 24, 2005

Garage Hijinks: The Monkey Wrench and the Grease Gun as PlayTools

The other day, I thought I'd do some cleaning up in the garage. I've been letting it go for a while, and what better way to spend a wintry day than in a heated garage.

The Harley is parked in back of the garage. I love to shine the layers of chrome on that bike.
The only way I have found to polish it is to attach some chamois cloth to one of my worn jock straps and give it a go. It gives me something soft to clean with and makes a sometimes hard job easily to accomplish. A hint. You can do this by yourself, but if you got any buds, the more the merrier.

I've been known to be handy with my tools. I keep some in the garage and some in the basement workshop. That way, when I need a wrench to work on the Harley or need to tighten up some garden tools, mowers, trimmers, whatever, I only have to reach up and grab the right tool.

As my dad always said, there is the correct tool for each specific job. I found that having the toolbench is a blessing. You have a place above it to store tools within your reach. I have also used it for pleasure. You'd be amazed how guys get off when they see a toolbench. I always had this fantasy about the night crew at the Home Depot. There must be a lot going on in the tool correl after hours. The saw horses alone can really cum in handy.

As with any tool, please read the instructions before using. But used safely, buffers and several other power tools and hand tools can get almost any job done.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Favorite Vacations

Being February and all, I thought that I digress a little and talk about favorite vacations.

One of the best vacations I ever had was several years back when I first visited Sydney, Australia. What a fantastic city. I went to Sydney Mardi Gras. I had a room overlooking the main parade route. I'll never forget the synchronized Marilyn Monroes, at least 60 guys dressed as Marilyn in her revealing pink dress. All those pink Marilyns, all those blonde wigs.
It brought the huge crowds to their knees. About a million spectators line the parade route.
Most of the spectators are straight who know a bloody good show when they see it. What you don't see at gay pride parades is the notion of starting on time. The parade began punctually at 8 pm.

I remember the huge party afterwards on the sight of one of the former Olympic venues. These big staging areas held the various dances. So many guys hung out between the buildings. I loved the leather dance, but all were really cool. Miles and miles of hot men dancing and having a great time. The ultimate circuit party. Later I went on an all male boat cruise around Sydney Harbor. The Opera House is stunning to see from the harbor. I got to hold a koala as well. That vacation was hard to beat. So guys if you are heading to Sydney, now is the time to go. Mardi Gras is the first Saturday in March and it is a fuckin blast.

Another time I flew over the Pacific and spent most of that vacation in both New Zealand and Australia. This time I flew into Auckland and enjoyed this city which is very similiar to San Francisco in its topography. Very hilly and influenced by Asian culture. I took a tour of the North Island where Auckland is located and then flew down to Wellington on the south end of the North Island. Wellington is the capital of New Zealand. It too resembles San Francisco, especially its weather. This city is very full of life, very unlike Camberra, the sleepy capital of Australia. It has museums and gardens. I loved walking the narrow hilly streets. And you can't go hungry anyway in NZ. The fish is excellent and the staff friendly. I then took a high spped ferry boat ride to the South Island. I was there when NZ had won their last America's Cup yacht race and the country had gone absolutely mad. On the South Island, it is more rustic and its high elevations are snow peaked. New Zealand was formed from a volcano and some parts of the South Island are still active. I rode down to the crown jewel of the South Island, Christ Church. I love CC very much. It is very English and it is remarkable because it is both charming and laid back. If you fly to Australia in the future, you have to make time to visit New Zealand.

If you guys have favorite vacation spots you'd like to share, feel free to do so. In the meantime, stay warm and snuggly.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Fun Things to Do This Weekend. How about BackPacking instead of BareBacking?

It's the weekend. You guys are really horny and want to have some fun.

There's not a better way to get it on than by backpacking. Sure, you say, its fuckin cold outside.
For those hardy souls, BP is a great way to connect. Who can't resist a guy dressed in hiking boots, a jock and a backpack. WOOOF. Besides the cold air makes those nipples stand at attention.

If you guys play inside, think of the possibilities. Put up a tent in your playspace and explore new trails. Make sure your BP has plenty of condoms for safe fun. You can toast marshmellows and have fun with various types of wiennies. YUM.

I have a reason for writing this way today. From my previous posts, I'm really concerned about the new strain of HIV virus recently discovered in NYC. The media is on this too. Richard Cohen in his weekly column says that we have only ourselves to blame. And he's right. Quoting him, "Unprotected, promiscuous sex in bathhouses, and at parties, and using drugs such as crystal meth to prolong both desire and performance are practices that should be no acceptable for gay that for heteros. Gays don't get some sort of pass just because they're gay."

Strong words, indeed. Even Dan Savage addresses the issue indirectly in his weekly, Savage Love, column. A reader asks Dan if there is any way medically to treat HIV that occurred accidentally when a condom broke. Sure, there's the morning after treatment, and yes, it has proven effective for previous strains. But this isn't a chance anyone should be taking now. Savage goes on to say that the best way to play is with someone you know. Sure, even 22 year old Circus de' Soleil hot performers can be HIV positive.

I am particularly pissed off since the know carrier of this new strain is a 40 something year old guy. Those of us who are in our 40's saw this shit happening a generation ago. It's 1985 all over again. We saw so many of our buds die of AIDS. Until the cocktail and new drugs, there wasn't effective treatment. Now it's deja vu all over again. Personally I don't want to see the long obituaries again in gay newspapers of deaths caused by AIDS.

With all the circuit parties and theme cruises happening in the next weeks through Memorial Day weekend, its particularly important that guys play safe. I know the temptation is there.
I want all guys to have fun, but play responsibly. I like raunchy sex as much as the next guy.
Get those boots dirty and have some fun, but strap on a condom when you are about to plow. That's all I ask.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

The Quick Fix Isn't the Best Approach for Getting the Job Done Right

So many guys look for the easy way to achieve results, no matter the consequences. They are, what I call, "shortcut artists".

A case in point. Our buddy, Jose Conseco, has been making headlines with allegations published in his new book, "Juiced". He tells in riveting detail how he self injected a cocktail made of human growth hormones and steroids into his butt cheeks and did the same to other players.
While the details are fuzzy and conflicting about how many times he did it to Mark McGuire, there is plenty of fingerpointing. Instead of working in the gym like Hank Aaron did, these guys looked for an edge to turn their mediocre careers around. Barry Bonds is a prime example of that. A decent player for the Pittsburgh Pirates in the late 80's, somehow he becomes this steroid freak in the late nineties and into the 21 century hitting homeruns everywhere, breaking individual records and now, 40, plans on breaking Babe Ruth's and Hank Aaron's home run records.

But this kind of abuse isn't just restricted to professional atheletes. My buddy, Spence, in his recent blog post,
reports that musclebears are also juicing up on this stuff. He reports that they can be seen at various bear runs with treetrunk necks, bulging pecs and humongus biceps. I've seen some of these guys around, but didn't pay much attention to them. But come to think of it, there are more of them now then there used to be. Their main fault is that they overdo it to a point where it becomes freakish and ugly. Again they want to be noticed and want to do it quickly. They want 'No Pain and Plenty of Gain". In the shortrun that may be getting away with it, but in the long run, they will suffer big time.

Somehow being "natural" isn't in vogue. I get the Viagra spam just as you do. If you need it, then by all means get a prescription and use it. But never abuse it. It is a wonderful feeling staying hard for a longer time, but there are natural ways to do this as well. And sometimes, it's all in the brain. Yea, that head, not the other one.

I feel that the natural way is the best way. It may not always be the quickest, but it is the most beneficial. Being a natural man is a woofy man who definitely gets 5 big hairy muscle hugs in my book any day.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Slip, Slap, Slop. The right way to play.

When I last visited Australia two of their summers ago, a major campaign had been underway to prevent skin cancer. I think we can apply this memorable advice to anal sex.

SLIP: A condom on. Have your partner do it for you. But never assume that he always will. Slip it on yourself. It's all in your control and you are the one that keeps fucking safe.

SLAP: his ass cheeks to signal that you are about ready to fuck his brains out.

SLOP: some lubricant onto your ready condomed cock and , you know what cums next.

We have to instill this practice in gay men so that it becomes second nature. I want every gay man to live life to its fullist and not have to live with HIV. As we get older, there will be enough disease and circumstances affecting our health that we may not be able to control. WE can control our exposure to HIV.

On a sad note, those of you who visit San Francisco will have one less bar to visit after March.
The really hot bar, the Loading Dock, is closing its doors forever after 8 glorious years.
Apparently the owner can't cover the expenses anymore. It seems that guys who still go out can only patronize so many bars. The Loading Dock fell a victim of economics.

It has an awesome layout. The second floor balcony is one of the best cruising spots in any gay bar I've seen. But layout alone can't make a bar profitable. It's the guys who hang out and support the bar that keeps it in business. RIP Loading Dock.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

A Potentially More Agressive Strain Of HIV Discovered

Hate to be the bearer of bad news to dampened this otherwise hot and sexy Valentine Week, but like HIV, the news of the new form of HIV has spread across the net and blog world.

Because of its supervirus characteristics, scientists today fear that this new strain may have caused the rapid progression from HIV to full blown AIDS in a mid-40's New York Gay male.

Two other men have been identified with the new strain. Scientists test the virus to the 20 licensed anti-retroviral drugs available today, and the strain was resistant to 19 of the 20 drugs.

Molecular tests of the one of the men's HIV show that it has changes that appear to differ significantly from strains found in NYC and precisely what those changes means still remains to be discovered.

The second guy found had sex with this guy probalby in October. Of course, it was unprotected sex, that's why he also has the virus. The third man was discovered in San Diego with the strain. Yet another man who had unprotected sex with the NYC dude, has been identified, but will not cooperate with AIDS scientists at the CDC and at the Aaron Diamond AIDS Research Center.

This is a very sad commentary that gay men are continuing to have unprotected safer sex. I guess this is happening more because of complacency than education. No one is that hot, that sexy to succumb to AIDS. I hope this awakens gay men who are promiscuous and practice barebacking, that the cocktails won't work against this new strain. So far, almost nothing will.

I know my buds out there practice safer sex. But sometimes we think with our cock, and not with our other head. If anyone hasn't read Randy Shilts' pioneering book from 1987, "And the Band Played On" dealing with the origins of AIDS and patient zero, he should try to do so. It is a must read. It is both an informative and definitive source on AIDS and has relevance to the discovery of this new strain.

On a lighter note, hoping everyone has an erotic and sexy Valentine's Day weekend. Hope you discovered new uses for edible icings and creamy spread chocolate frosting. Hot, passionate sex can be tasty too.

Friday, February 11, 2005

Yet Another Traitor Within our Midst Exposed Bigtime

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Thursday, February 10, 2005

Pucker Up. Being LipLocked and Loving It

One of my favorite Valentine's Day rituals is playing suck face with a special buddy.

It all starts off quite innocently and always unexpectedly. Usually in a naked state.

It can happen when I'm making him breakfast, whipping up some waffle batter, or shaving, or at the spur of the moment.

I first grab him around the waist and almost instantaneously pull him to me and plant a passionate kiss on his lips. The next several seconds is pure enchantment. Meanwhile the tongue is pursuing its own explorations. Before I know it, I'm deeply kissing him and pumping my body into his. It's definitely getting hot and heavy.

So I recommend the best way to start off the day with your special one is to smooch. Of course, this is very spontaneous. But if you need a prop or reason, a long stem red rose, preferably dethorned placed in your lips will give the signal that you coming on to him romanticly.

Give it a try. And if you have other ways to show your special someone that you really love him, I'd like to read them. But be warned, the sizzling passion may activate every smoke alarm in your home and you both may have some hunky fireman knocking on the door to join in the fun.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Terms of Endearment

Have you noticed reading various blog posts, when guys want to acknowledge a great guy, we give them cute names like WOOFY, Stud and Hunky.

There are many cute names I use and have seen other guys use.
Here are some of my favorites.

Sweet Cheeks: when you see a really hot ass, use this.

Bubble Butt: same here, with added emphasis.

Fuzzy Butt: same as above but with nice fur.

Hottie: a guy who arouses your senses.

Gruf: a hairy faced hunk with an edge.

Fuzzyface: a really nice bearded guy.

Thunderthighs: a dude with really nice legs.

Cutie Pie: a younger guy who turns you on.

Musclestud/musclebear/musclecub: great bod, the latter with nice furry chest and great pecs.

Beefybud: muscular in all the right places.

There are probably many others. If you have a favorite, let me know.

All of you to me are my studbuds. Take care, men. WOOF.

Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Start Spreading the News: New York! New York! I Do Solemnly Swear, Walking Him and Him, Down the Aisle

The recent New York State Supreme Court ruling says that same-sex couples must be allowed to marry. The 62 page decision will go into effect in New York County in 30 days. The State of New York Supreme Court Justice Doris Ling-Cohan said that the New York State Constitution guarnatees basic freedoms to same-sex couples and that those rights are violated when same-sex couples are denied marriage licenses. Very good news indeed.

Just think of the possibilities. The writers of Will and Grace now will have their double, double ring wedding ceremony as the series finale. Will and his lawfully wedded man to be and Grace and her chump. How romantic. Lisa Minelli can guest and sing a medley of her songs, including New York, New York. How's that for jump starting a sagging career. And every other New York based sitcom and drama can jump on the bandwaggon. Gay writers have dreamed of this possibility for quite a long time.

My favorite stud, Kyle of Kyle's Bed and Breakfast,
can now have that marriage ceremony with his hot new boyfriend, Breyer, right in the BnB. Greg Fox can draw Kyle in his white tux and Breyer in his black leather tux and spit polished Dahner boots. WOOF.

There will , most likely, be further developments in this ongoing story. Stay tuned.

Monday, February 07, 2005

The Wacky World of Super Bowl Commercials

I too only watch the Super Bowl for the commercials, since I didn't have a vested interest in this year's game.

It's really fun using TiVO to watch something live like this. I used TiVO and let it run for over 2 hours while I was watching something else I had TiVoed. Then I fastforwarded until I saw the commercials and started watching them.

The best probably was the hunk for the Diet Pepsi ad. The set up was a hunk just strutting down an urban sidewalk, all the chicks banting as they passed him on the sidewalk. You'd see the backs of their heads walking towards him. Then you see a dishwater blond head of hair walking towards him. The head then turns and low and behold, its Carson from Queer Eye turning completely around as the hunk passes him. This was funny and cute all at the same time. We as gay men, scored a touchdown on that one. Who would have thought this to be imaginable 5 or even 10 years ago to see a gay man in this kind of commercial.

The Brad Pitt Heineken ad was a little too much. I had to rewind the end when he calls for help.
Too bad it couldn't been him saying, Jennifer, help me. Instead it was a nondiscriptive sigh for help as the mob stalks his front door of his lavish condo building. Poor guy, he's like the rest of us, has to go out to get his Heineken by himself.

Another cute one was the Fedex-Kinkos top ten ingredients for a Super Bowl commercial featuring Burt Reynolds and the talking Bear. This went off well and really jumped.

Several monkey commercials as well. They lend themselves to the drunken Super Bowl viewer who is pretty wiped out by halftime. The ad execs feel that the only way to grab that viewers attention is a barrel of monkeys being cute pitching a product.

Some other endorsements worthy of note: The Muppets for Pizza Hut. . . always great to see Miss Piggy working; M C Hammer making fun of himself, and the strangest of all, Gladys Knight sliding on the astro turf for MBNA. All in all, pretty neat entertainment. And if you didn't stay until the end, the Patriots won, yet another one, 24-21 over the Eagles. Now if anyone could just cover some of the post game shower room antics, then that might be a Super Bowl worth watching.

Friday, February 04, 2005

Cher, Say It isn't so.

Cher recently announced that her final concert of her "Never Can Say Goodbye" Farewell Tour is April 30th at the Hollywood Bowl. She chose it because it was where her and Sonny gave their first large audience performance.

So far, her tour has gone on for three years with 325 shows. She's been all over the US, several times including 4 alone in Vegas, as well as Europe, Mexico, Australia, Canada and New Zealand. During this long voyage, she has sold more than 3 million tickets and touched the lives of millions more. Have wigs, sequins and mike, will travel, should be her moniker.

I can't quibble with the fact that this tour, while the butt of lots of jokes, has been a windfall, financially for Cher. She is the envy of every diva, past, present and future. She is the epitomy of showmanship. She makes the Energizer Bunny pale in comparison. And she can sing as well.

What next for Cher? If indeed April 30th is the last concert, then I guess she'll jumpstart her acting career again. I hope she doesn't have to do reality TV. With all her dough, she can produce anything she wants.

Enough about our patron saint for now. One of my favorite singers, Shelby Lynne, is releasing her next album in May, 2005. I can't wait to hear that. Shelby, while not a diva, is a very sensitive singer and songwriter who can mesmerize her audience with sulky, meaningful songs.
I can't get enough of Shelby, so her new release will enable her fans to sample more of her great songs. If you get a chance, download her smash, "Telephone". It's a classic.

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Finally Got my Flu Shot and went to the Dentist. I'm a Glutton for Punishment.

Finally, in the MidAtlantic anyway, the flu shot restrictions were lifted and not a moment too soon. The area has seen a flu outbreak in the past week. Officials decided to lift the restrictions because the flu vaccine has to be given by the end of February, or else, disposed of.

This is a really sad statement about our public health services. This should have never happened. Long lines formed last October and early November. Limited vaccine was available.
Only the most needy were given the vaccine. Now that the restrictions are lifted, is it too little too late?

Early in the day, I had my six month dental checkup, cleaning and scaling. While this is fine, the procedure went somewhat wacky. I had the right side of my mouth scaled six months ago. I don't need novacaine and I thought that was stated in my file. Well, yesterday, before I could shout, the dentist had injected novacaine into my left jaw. I didn't see it coming. It seems that in that six months, he has become a pain free dentist. Pain free my ass. My whole left side swelled like a balloon. The scaling was performed, but I am still swelled this morning. Not a pretty site. I was assured that the swelling would go today. I sure hope so.

Enuf about me for today. Hoping everything with you is well and pleasurable. I've got several comments about the cinnabunn frosting. I hope you men enjoy the experience. Big hairy muscle hugs.

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Will He or Won't He? The Annual Ritual of Groundhog Day

Punxsutawney Phil is today's man. The entire world will be watching his prediction of whether or not he sees his shadow. Seeing his shadow indicates 6 more weeks of winter. If he basks in the afterglow of a zillion cameras and sticks around, spring is just around the corner. ( to learn more about Phil and his cast of human characters, click on,
Ironicly he upstages our President's State of the Union speech tonight. How fitting.

Like Phil, some of the White House staff has predictable powers as well. His speech writers will make Shrub sound very knowledgeable while the cameras pan the House chambers and the balcony for invited guests reactions. There will be numerous moments of applause, some standing ovations, and others protesting to the point of not standing after some quotable phrase he will utter. Just like Phil, he will be playing for the cameras.

He will praise Sunday's vote in Iraq and the courage of the Iraqi people. Those who voted do deserve recognition. They were gusty and valued the opportunity to vote in a free election, something we should admire, since only a fraction of us ever get off our butts to vote. But hey, they vote on a weekend day, while we are stuck with this Tuesday crap.

He will also talk about his proposal for revamping the Social Security system. We all know from what our parents receive, that it isn't enough money to matter much. We know that we have to think about our financial future by squirreling away some hard earned dollars every paycheck, hoping it will be enough to get us through our "golden years". The individual accounts, are the answer, according to the White House spin masters, because the financial markets will determine the overall return. Yea, they forget about the stock market adjustments in the 1980's and the market's gyrations in the 90's. It seems like a money grubbing scheme by Wall Street to cash in on trillions of dollars, automatically flowing into their accounts. Just hope these money managers don't find another Enron to invest in.

So today is a day of prediction. Will the groundhog see his shadow? Will the State of the Union speech be interrupted at least 50 times? We'll find out soon enough. But will any of this really matter in the broad scheme of things? I really doubt it. But after all, there's always next year.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Sticky Buns

Over the weekend, I thought I get the Valentine Day spirit going during playtime.

I made my playpal some cinnabuns, those breakfast rolls you can make from scratch or buy in the refrigerated case, made by Pillsbury. Oh that popnfresh Doughboy. Now that's another blog.

Things got out of hand and before I knew it, I was spreading the white icing over his hot set of bunns. I used my icing squirt sleeve and told him to spread, cheeks up. I made two icing hearts, one on each cheek and proceeded to lick away. You can tell that I like cleaning up any mess on a hairy hunky guys body with my tongue. You got to hold your hands around the front of his thighs to keep him constrained if you are doing this while he is standing up. Anyway he got away eventually, and proceeded to grab the icing tube and squirted some on my fuzzy cheeks, as I was trying to get away. He got me on my knees, butt cheeks out and began squirting and licking. It got kinda messy, nothing a quick shower couldn't handle.

If you want to try this on Valentine's Day, I suggest you plan ahead. It would be wise to place a plastic tarp wherever you expect to play, so that cleaning up afterwards is a breeze.

I like to use the following recipe for the icing: 1 cup of 10x sugar, 1 tablespoon milk and 1/2 tsp vanilla. Add a little more milk if you want the consistency a little more smooth. It can also be applied with your finger since it is the consistency of a sugary paste.

Happy licking guys and big hairy muscle hugs.